when you must move.

It’s been one year and three months since we last saw Davis.
It’s been a time of confusion, sadness, pain, and darkness.
We ache to understand why the door was closed on us.
And I feel like writing this over and over again on the blog does nothing to relieve that pain so I just stopped.

Over this time though, we’ve been forced to look back and remember specifically why we were drawn to adoption in the first place.
Was it just to save one child, Davis, or was it just to save a child, any child, one of the hundreds of thousands without a family?
Truthfully, there were many times we said “it is only Davis or nothing”—our hearts still raw and the wounds still fresh from a failed adoption.
But slowly, ever so carefully, God reminded us,

“Draw near to me, hold on to me, don’t lose Hope, persevere.” Hebrews 10:22-23

When we stopped allowing ourselves to listen only to our own pain, we remembered the pains of thousands, the stories of the lonely and forgotten, the reason we chose adoption in the first place.

Rescue.

Redemption.

Freedom.

Love.

Last summer we decided we still wanted adoption to be a part of our story.
Love still wins. Period.
We still choose Davis, always, but that situation is out of our hands.

  “We need to do what we can do and let God do what we cannot.” Joyce Meyer

We began the search for another child in need, another child waiting for his turn to be CHOSEN.
With hearts open to whatever God was to put in our path, we waited.
And waited, and waited, and prayed, and with great patience, waited some more.

Then one day, a message showed up on Facebook.
 “He looks like a Jupin to me.”
Through a series of notes between friends we quickly learned of a bright young man who asks every day, “Are you my family? Please tell me about my family.  I want a family too.”
His story touched us all and broke our hearts all over again.
He has been overlooked for his entire life, abandoned, rejected…yet he bravely asks for his greatest desire—a family.
I cannot imagine his courage yet I share his desperation.

Together, with the children, we decided YES! we can do this.
He will be ours, a part of our story and our family,  Lord willing.
Fast forward to today and the paperwork consumes us yet again and we are *this* close to finishing our dossier.
We await approval from USCIS and once that comes, we await submittal to his country.

Please allow me to formally introduce you to “Jude”. 
He will most certainly have a different name but we will refer to him as Jude here.

From what we’ve learned, he’s quite a character and as sweet as they come.
We can't wait to meet him.

You may see more of me here in the next few months.
I have a guarded heart full of emotions and words that struggle to make it to the page, but I think writing will be an important part of our journey.
I am scared, I am afraid of failure once again, but life is full of disappointments, many as big as what we’ve endured.
Many even bigger.

We have Hope, we will persevere IN FAITH.
We covet your prayers and well wishes.

Sorry, adoption blog trolls, your comments are not welcome here and will be deleted in a heart beat. Save your energy for someone else.

With Love Always,
Amy