Wednesday, November 30, 2011

30.

this morning, at 3:15am, john and i were both awake.
arguing.
over the most ridiculousness ever.
i finally fell asleep at 5:00.
my alarm went off at 5:40.
ugh.
my eyes have felt like i have sandpaper on them all day.
i drank three cups of coffee and a large sweet tea.
didn't help one bit.

in the car this afternoon, josh told me that my music was lame.
LAME.
i told him he can play his cool music when he has his own car but now it's only lame music all the time!

a friend stopped by tonight that i haven't seen in forever.
she asked me if i was going to have a baby and rubbed my flabby belly.
she was laughing, joking about how we passed our fertile month already (which is very true) but i think she was for real.
john thought it was hilarious.
i think we may be having another argument at 3:15am tonight.
whatever.
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so today is the last day of november.
why do the days seem to fly by?
i remember as a kid thinking it took forever to get to december every year.
now as an adult, it comes in a flash.
and then it's over and it's another day again and then another year...

sometimes i stop and think, how in the world am i 36 years old?!
and a mother too?
and a wife?
oh my goodness.
i'm a chubby, lame, grouchy, arguing woman!
what is happening to me?????

i need chocolate.
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30. today i'm grateful for another month, another day, another moment in this blessed life i'm living.
i am not perfect and live a flawed life.
very flawed.
but i am grateful for each and every moment of it, the slow, the fast, the tough and trying, the splendid, the inspiring.

7 comments:

stephanie said...

You have really pretty eyes. I hope you get a better sleep tonight:) I adore your blog.

Our Family said...

"i'm a chubby, lame, grouchy, arguing woman!
what is happening to me?????" AMEN!

. said...

While I am only 27, I sometimes feel like I'm older than the moon. My mindset seems so old to me, but then I realize that's me, that's how I was raised, and that's how my life is playing out. You're adorable. I'm praying you were able to find rest. Hugs!

Anonymous said...

I think you are very pretty and I don't think you are chubby at all. You bring inspiration to many every day. But sometimes no matter what other people tell us, we feel what we feel. Here is to brighter tomorrows! And PS.. I will be 50 in 2012 and starting when I turned 49 I have made a conscious decision that I will celebrate 50 instead of mourn it. I am actually looking forward to celebrating it.
Amy James

Chrissie Grace said...

I think I just had my 36 year old mid life crisis. Lol
I think your gorgeous
xoxo

meg duerksen said...

that is a GORGEOUS picture of you!!!
and i feel the same!
how did i get here?
who is this MOM that is tired and cranky all the time.

do you need me to go kick that ladies butt for asking if you were pregnant?! cause i will.

someone asked me last month at church.
i was shocked.
it caught me totally off guard.
not cool.
you don't ask someone unless you see a baby falling out of them. that's my rule.

Kimberlee said...

You know what sent me into a tailspin this week?
On Bruce's birthday my dad told Bruce that he was 37 when I was in the 9th grade...nice since we have an 8 year old and a 4 year old. How did I get here? Exactly.

And you are gorgeous and I wish you posted pictures of your beautiful self way more often!

Miss you!